RECALL NOTICE:
The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.

This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.

This defect has been technically termed, "Subsequential Internal Non-morality", or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.

Some other symptoms:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish, or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect.

The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.

The number to call for repair in all areas is:

P-R-A-Y-E-R.

Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure.

Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, JESUS, into the heart component.

No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it
with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control

Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers Instructions Before Leaving Earth), for further details on the use of these fixes.

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on JESUS.

DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.

Thank you for your immediate attention.

GOD

[Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice!!!  You can also contact your local pastors for further instruction and technical support. MSD]

At Camp FIRE this year, Michelle N. tried to persuade me to forsake my beloved PC and go over to Macintosh. At first, I thought there would be no way, but after reading this from Sword & Spirit, I might have to reconsider. This one is for you, Michelle.

MSD

In the beginning, God had a computer.

And God entered: C:\Let there be light!

Enter user ID

C:\God

Enter password

C:\Omniscient

Invalid password

Enter password

C:\Omnipotent

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.

C:\ Let there be light.

Unrecognizable command

C:\Create light

Done

C:\Run heaven and earth

And God created Day and Night

And God saw that there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Monday, March 2.

C:\Let there be firmament in the midst of water and light

Unrecognizable command. Try again.

C:\Create firmament

Done.

C:\Run firmament

And God divided the waters. And God saw that there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Monday, March 2.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.

C:\Let the waters under heaven be gathered together unto one place and let the dry land appear and...

Too many characters in specification string. Try again.

C:\Create dry_land

Done.

C:\Run firmament

And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.

C:\Create lights in the firmament to divide the day from the night

Unspecified type. Try again.

C:\Create sun_moon_stars

C:\Run sun_moon_stars

And God separated the light from the darkness. The sun ruled over the day and the moon and stars ruled over the night.

And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.

And God logged on at 12:01AM, Thursday, March 5

C:\Create fish

Done

C:\Create fowl

Done

C:\Run fish, fowl

And God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that creepeth where the waters swarmed after its kind and every winged fowl after its kind.

And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Friday, March 6.

C:\Create cattle

Done

C:\Create creepy_things

Done

C:\Now let us make man in our image

Unspecified type. Try again.

C:\Create man

Done

C:\Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air and over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth

Too many command operands. Try again.

C:\Run multiplication

Execution terminated. 6 errors.

C:\Run Breath

Done

C:\Run multiplication

Execution terminated. 5 errors.

C:\Move man to Garden of Eden

Filename: Garden of Eden does not exist.

Abort, Retry, Ignore?

C:\Create Garden_of_Eden

Too many parameters

C:\Create Garden Eden.

Done

C:\Move man to Garden of Eden.

Done

C:\Run multiplication

Execution terminated. 4 errors.

C:\Copy woman from man

Done

C:\Run multiplication

Execution terminated. 2 errors.

C:\Create desire

Done

C:\Run multiplication

And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden Eden.

Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

C:\Create freewill

Done

C:\Run freewill

And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden Eden.

Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

C:\Undo desire

Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.

C:\Destroy freewill

Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.

Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.

C:\Help

Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.

Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.

Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.

C:\Create tree_of_knowledge

C:\Create good, evil

Done

C:\Activate evil

And God saw he had created shame.

Warning system error in sector E95.

Man and woman no longer located in Garden.edn. 1 errors.

C:\Scan Garden.edn for man, woman

Search failed. Abort, Retry, Ignore?

C:\Delete shame

Shame cannot be deleted once evil has been activated.

C:\Destroy freewill

Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.

Enter replacement,cancel, or ask for help.

C:\Stop

Unrecognizable command. Try again

C:\Ctrl_Break

C:\Ctrl_Break

ATTENTION ALL USERS *** ATTENTION ALL USERS:

COMPUTER GOING DOWN FOR REGULAR DAY OF MAINTENANCE AND REST IN FIVE MINUTES

PLEASE LOG OFF.

C:\Create new world

You have exceeded allocated file space. You must destroy old files before new ones can be created.

C:\ Destroy earth

Destroy earth: Please confirm.

C:\Destroy earth

Confirmed

COMPUTER DOWN *** COMPUTER DOWN.

SERVICE WILL RESUME SUNDAY, MARCH 8 AT 12:01 AM.

YOU MUST SIGN OFF NOW.

And God logged off at 11:59:59 PM, Friday, March 6.

On Saturday, March 7, God rested.

On March 8, God created Macintosh.